From the diary of Max Segredo
I’ve landed in the single weirdest group home I’ve ever seen (so far). First off, Merry Sunshine Orphanage is in this spooky old house, protected by video cameras, a double front door, and spikes on the roof. Spikes? I mean, seriously, what are they expecting, a zombie invasion?
Haven’t met the other ‘poor unfortunates’ yet, but suspect the staff may be a bit mental. This bloke Styx, who’s built like a grizzly bear, answered the door. His main job seems to be toting things about and acting grumpy. But the orphanage director, Mrs. Wong? Even stranger. For one thing, she goes about heavily armed. And for another, she didn’t bat an eye when my social worker told her I’d been kicked out of foster homes for stealing and lighting fires.
Know what she said? “Learn to control fire, and if you’re stealing, don’t get caught.” Good advice, sure. But that doesn’t sound like any group home director I’ve ever met. Oh, and she told me the orphanage’s three rules are: no smoking, no unsupervised gunplay, and loyalty above all. What does that even mean?
We’ll see how things turn out tomorrow. At least they didn’t send me to juvie, after what happened at the Bumburgers’ house tonight. And they certainly could have, even though lighting the house on fire was entirely NOT my fault. (Not that anyone believes me.)
All things considered, this hasn’t been my favorite birthday so far.